The Real Housewives of Atlanta Season-Premiere Recap: Back to Basics

After the failure of last year’s soft reboot, Atlanta returns by getting back to the basics and bringing in two newbies.
Photo: Bravo

Raise your hand if you’re exhausted by the amount of content Bravo is pumping out right now. It’s okay, this is a safe space for all the chronically online fans trying to juggle real life while staying updated with the Bravoverse. While I’m so thankful for the dopamine hit, I can admit to being overstimulated by the culmination of the chicness of Ladies of London, the campiness of RHORI, and the terror of Summer House. But, as a super fan of RHOA, we can’t let the chaos eclipse our peaches! So let’s put down our Scamanda detective hats, stop trying to differentiate Dolores Cantania’s clones, and take a trip down south to support our girls.

I’m an eternally optimistic viewer; every year, I’m convinced this will be the season that brings the spark back to the legendary franchise. We came close with last year’s soft reboot until a gun-toting newbie and trigger-happy veteran derailed us, but based on this season’s premiere, it looks like we’re slowly getting back on track (we’re also closer than ever to having Nene on our screens once again with the upcoming Ultimate Girls Trip). Right now, RHOA has the opportunity to be the nostalgic comfort show amidst the many Bravo happenings, a role that RHOBH fumbled with the banality of its current season.

It’s not the most shocking episode, as a scandal doesn’t precede the season — unless you count Porsha finally slithering out of the closet and into a same sex relationship, though no longtime real viewer could be surprised by that revelation. Instead, we return to some of the RHOA basics we know and love — there are rented boyfriends, Phaedra stuttering through lies, and Cynthia giving us nothing but cheekbones and an emphatic “Now what else is going on?” so perhaps we can really expect a return to form. Fingers crossed!

Production seems to revert to the recipe they intended for last season by mixing old faces with fresh names to represent a new era that reflects modern-day Atlanta. To replace the two HR hazards we lost last year, they’ve brought in reality veteran and R&B chart-topper K. Michelle, as well as the established entrepreneur Pinky Cole. Full disclosure: my bougie ass doesn’t indulge in reality TV outside of the Bravo network, so I don’t know much about the singer, but that allows me to judge her performance as a Housewife objectively, which I think she deserves, especially as she enters a new chapter where she’s aspiring to establish herself as a country artist (that Beyoncé co-sign is major!). However, what I do know is that many were skeptical about Bravo dipping into VH1’s nachos by bringing a Love and Hip Hop alum onto the franchise, particularly after last season, when some fans literally complained about RHOA morphing into the show K used to be a part of.

While I believe some of that critique is rooted in anti-Blackness, I did understand the concern. We want the fabulosity and friendship to outweigh the heavily produced, exaggerated conflict. But from what I’m seeing so far, I don’t see K. Michelle contributing to that issue. In fact, she was the one (rightfully) comparing her experience at Porsha’s dinner to a Tyler Perry production. The dinner is the first group event of the season, with Porsha inviting her castmates and their significant others to the sprawling mansion she wrangled from her divorce from Simon Guobadia, making it an apt setting for Tyler Perry drama to ensue.

As most of the women note, Simon’s presence lingers through the echoing halls of Porsha’s new palace — both literally and metaphorically, thanks to some great editing of his shadow lurking in the background — a feeling worsened by Porsha parading a new man on her arm. There’s no point in naming or spending too much time discussing this random rent-a-man because we all know Porsha’s love life is heading in a different direction. In the words of Lisa Nicole from Married to Medicine, I wanted to yell through the screen, “What about your lessssbian relationship?!” But that will come in due time, and I, for one, am proud of Porsha for being open with her sexuality, no matter how long it takes. For now, we’ll humor Porsha and pretend that this man is a legitimate suitor.

Porsha isn’t the only one who loosely interprets the instructions to bring their partner. Cynthia and Drew bring their significant others via FaceTime, with Cynthia taping fake dreadlocks to her phone to represent her new boyfriend’s hairstyle and Drew’s “friend” from last season, Blackk, staying on the line for the entirety of the dinner. Kelli, based on the other women’s commentary, is accompanied by what can only be described as community dick (come on, post-divorce hoe phase!). Phaedra has another rental man who kind of looks like her “boyfriend,” Cheick, from her stint on Married to Medicine, but could also be another random plucked from the same casting call where Porsha found hers. Only K. Michelle, Pinky, and Angela bring legitimate partners. Although I usually frown upon males taking up too much screentime, I get a kick out of Charles Oakley’s asshole nature, and it’s nice to get to know the newbies’ families.

Despite the discourse surrounding K. Michelle clashing with the show, for me, it was Pinky and her husband who seemed like fish out of water. I mean this with no shade, but Pinky, creator of Atlanta’s Slutty Vegan restaurant, is almost too regular compared to her castmates. As Kelli points out, her outfit alone signals her entry into a different type of circle. Was the fit a bit misaligned from what we’re used to from Atlanta Housewives? Sure, but she’s just a normal person; she doesn’t yet have a closet full of “looks” that border on being costumes, so she did what she could with what she had. Pinky reminds me of some amazing women I met in college with her Black girl-next-door vibes, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Sometimes having a normie on the cast balances the energy of the more eccentric ladies and can even lead to some fun, Jury Duty-esque humor that emerges when a regular person watches larger-than-life drama unfold around them.

Pinky might not immediately scream “Real Housewife,” but she is already connected to the cast by brushing shoulders with Shamea, Phaedra, K. Michelle, and Kelli. Phaedra, Shamea, and K give Pinky the seal of approval, while Kelli deems her not a “girls’ girl,” which perhaps foreshadows a beef between the two restaurateurs. Kelli should be careful if we’re strictly comparing restaurants — Pinky is franchising Slutty Vegan, while, thanks to some shady boots on the ground reporting from Drew Sidora, we know Nana’s Chicken and Waffles has seen better days.

Between Kelli giving Pinky the cold shoulder and the inescapable tension from ex-bffs Porsha and Shamea, Porsha’s couple’s dinner lays the groundwork for drama to come, while also tying up some loose strings from last season. Porsha and Shamea are no longer on speaking terms after a rocky past year, exacerbated by a heated post-reunion text exchange. Shamea’s discomfort in Porsha’s home is palpable, though Porsha does her best to maintain appearances as a good host. Drew is actually the one to get things popping first, the seasoned actor and shit starter that she is, prodding at an already on-edge Shamea about her husband’s whereabouts. The inquiry was innocent enough, but Shamea was sitting ready upon entering Simon’s, I mean, Porsha’s house. Shamea responds passively-aggressively, telling Drew to “focus on your Zoom call.”

The drama keeps flowing after the men leave to roll cigars, leaving the women to get down to the good stuff. Angela opens the floor for Shamea and Porsha to update the group on their friendship journey, and both women remain respectful and guarded (which is not surprising; their relationship runs so deep, I know that their storyline will continue to be a slow burn), so shadow-producer Cynthia shifts gears to Shamea’s friction with Drew. Drew feels that Shamea’s melancholy Hallmark card-inspired apology video for her actions last season was disingenuous, questioning why Shamea continued to come for her during the apology by saying she could’ve gone harder on Drew at the reunion. This line of questioning leads to Shamea flipping things back on Drew, claiming Drew told Phaedra that she wasn’t fully convinced by Angela’s receipts regarding last year’s June Bug drama.

Phaedra corroborates Shamea’s claim, saying Drew did, in fact, approach her after the reunion with her doubts. Angela doubles down on her evidence, affirming that a woman told her at a Hawks’ game that Phaedra was behind the drama. Phaedra jumps into slippery attorney mode, alleging that security video and audio from the game prove Angela is lying. How Phaedra accessed clear recordings of an intimate conversation between two people in the crowd of an NBA game is beyond me (the answer is that she’s lying). This confrontation is the last straw for K. Michelle, who abruptly gets up and leaves the conversation, obviously reconsidering what the hell she signed up for. Her fourth-wall-breaking stare in the teaser for next week’s episode is another moment you can see her hilariously questioning her decision to join the show. In her confessional, she says, “When I got invited to this party, I thought I would get to be a bougie American in an African house. That all the ladies would have on their gowns, and their real diamonds, and they would drink champagne.” Buckle up, baby, this might be Bravo, but it ain’t Beverly Hills!

The group agrees to table the discussion until they get the tapes (so … never), and Kelli, Shamea’s new bff, keeps poking at Porsha on her friend’s behalf. Porsha shuts down any further messy conversations, choosing instead to focus on being a good host, ending the night with an awkward kiss with her fake boyfriend. All in all, it’s a tame start to a new season, but that might be the levity we need amidst the current state of the Bravo universe. I have faith in my peaches!